Daddy

Todd is an amazing daddy. From the moment our first child was born he was one of those jump in change diapers, feed and cuddle dads. When he comes home from work he immediately jumps in and anticipates what the girls may need. He does a huge portion of caring for them when he comes home. And I never feel anxious about leaving them home alone with him. Not only is he helpful to me, but the girls just adore him.

They both light up when he walks in the room. It is amazing to watch them form bonds and closeness with their daddy. They have special little "things" that belong only to them. Daddy is the one they can jump on and the one who will throw them in the air and help them walk on the ceiling. Daddy means fun and play and running around. But he is also really good at getting them to obey him. Sometimes they will test me to the limit, but he simply has to give a firm tone and they will turn and listen.

He truly is an amazing man and I am glad he is mine! For part two of Love Story.

Wise One

So in honor of our 6th anniversary on May 7th, I want to share with you a little about my love of my life. For more of our love story read here...My plan is to post one thing every day that I love about him/ being married to him until that day arrives. Hopefully that works out.

One of the reasons that I fell in love with Todd was that he was always searching for God. He really wanted to follow God and obey His word. He fought hard to follow God's way. And early on I noticed that he was really wise. When he offered advice to me during our friendship (pre-dating) it always seemed to be really wise advice. He continues to be a man of wisdom.

When he gives me direction, even when I do not think it is the best thing, I really listen. I don't follow him blindly or disobey the Lord, but he really is one of the wisest men I have ever known. He searches the scriptures and digs for the truth on issues. He is never content with just taking someones word for it. He has to see what God really says about something. He often gets really angry when verses of the Bible are used out of context. In his heart he wants people to see the truth and not blindly believe something because someone told them it was that way.

I love that I am married to a man who is committed to allowing God's word be the lamp to his feet.

Dust Bunny

The other day, I was cleaning up breakfast dishes and preparing for the day when Claire came up to me with something in her hand that looked like the picture above. I laughed really hard and then realized she had been trying to retrieve some ball from underneath a shelf in the kitchen. This shelf is one that I forget to clean under until I see the dirt that has accumulated. I forget mostly because I don't see it. And out of sight is out of mind. I struggle most days to remember to take a shower myself, so cleaning has been a hard task since the arrival of baby one and two.

I have to say that I am getting better. I have read some things on organizing and cleaning and I think our house stays pretty tidy for the most part. That does not mean there are no crumbs or dust bunnies. And right now I just remembered that there is a load of laundry in the washer that has been there for over 24 hours. But I have a much better handle on things than I once did. I will never have an immaculate house. But disorganization and clutter drives me nuts. So here are some things I have learned that has helped me out.

1. Keep cleaning items in every room.
Practically here is what that means for me. I have a broom and mop on every floor of the house. So often I would think of sweeping upstairs, but not have the time to run downstairs and gather all the items required. Now with a broom upstairs it takes 1/2 the time to complete the task. Also I bought an off brand package of cleaning wipes that I keep in each bathroom. When a sink or toilet are dirty I simply pull one out and wipe. It takes less than five minutes and it brightens the room tremendously.

2. Organize
Everything needs a home. If an item does not have a home it will end up on counters, on floors and clutter up your space. And if the items home is not easily accessible, you will probably not put it away that often. That defeats the purpose. Create usable and workable solutions to your clutter problems. For me that was bags. I have various bags that I keep packed. One for going to my parents house for work, one bag with change of clothes for day to day stuff for kids, one with coloring books and stickers for eating out or doctor visits, etc. These bags ended up hanging on the backs of my kitchen chairs. Or worse on the floor in the kitchen. It drove me nuts. Now I have some hooks on the wall just at the top of the basement stairs. The bags now have a home and they are easily accessible when I need them.

3. Clean up a little at a time.
Some people probably already do this, but I was cleaning challenged. Before kids I kind of let things go throughout the week. Todd and I both worked all day, so I would straighten up here and there, but often dishes and messes were left until the weekend. I would spend 5-6 hours on Saturday cleaning. After kids I have no 5-6 straight hours in any given week. So now this means, the dishwasher is emptied when the dishes are clean. That way as soon as a dish is dirty it can go in the dishwasher. When the dishwasher is full I start it. Simple and easy. Also kitchen counters are wiped at every meal. Floor is swept after every meal or at least after every other. I may not have 5-6 hours, but 5-6 minutes means a lot in terms of maintenance.

4. Give yourself a break.
In all honesty I was bit embaressed when Claire came to me with a months full of dust on her hand. But I know that she and Elizabeth will only be little once. I could spend countless hours wiping, dusting, sweeping, disinfecting (I already do, but even more so). But the times spent with them are the times that last. They will not remember the times that the bathroom was a little dirty or the day that I left the toys scattered on the floor. They will probably not even remember specific times that I read a book or played with a toy or took them outside. But they will remember what our family time felt like. They will have a sense of what type of life I created for them. If we never make a mess or if I never leave a mess alone to play with them that will create a lasting impression.

Now some of you are probably thinking that these are very easy and not rockets science. You are right and you are probably the people who already do these things. But for the rest of us, I hope that this post gives you some freedom and some practical tips.

I do not have it all figured out. Right now my house is a bit crazy. Today I did not do dishes or laundry or sweep or wipe anything except butts and noses. Today I took my daughter on a mommy daughter date, had lunch with my husband and kids, watched as my kids jumped on their daddy for 45 minutes and laughed until I had tears in my eyes. I took a 2.5 hour nap with my husband. I woke up and ate pizza with my inlaws. Today was an eventful day. And I wish all days were as wonderful.

Alexa

Yesterday we went to the park and the saddest thing happened. My little girl experienced her first time being called a name by a peer. I did not see it happen, but was told later that a little girl, not more than 4 years old, walked by Elizabeth and said, "Loser."

Initially, the mom in me wants to take that little girl by the arm and take her straight to time out. (Or more honestly smack her mouth.) How dare she call my sweet, wonderful, beautiful, gifted and loving child a loser? Who are her parents? Why are they not teaching her that calling names is an awful thing? (If I am honest I know that her parents very well could be good, loving people who just let her watch or see something she should not have and she learned it from that.)

But then the verse came to my mind where we are told how to deal with those who mistreat us and wound us. (Matthew 5:43-48) So last night before we went to bed Elizabeth and I prayed for the little girl who called her the name at the park. Elizabeth named her Alexa and we prayed for Alexa last night. We prayed that she would know God's love and experience him and that she could learn to be loving to other people.

I wish I always responded that way to my enemies. I wish I could say I felt no anger or malice towards Alexa. But I did. I really am thankful I did not hear her say that to my child. I very well could have smacked her and her mother in that moment. But I am thankful that I had the opportunity to teach Elizabeth how to respond and I hope that as a result she is drawn more close to the Lord.

I know the reality is that Elizabeth will have people who call her names. She will have enemies in her life. She will have people who are mean and mistreat her. I hope that she will follow Jesus even through those moments. One thing that I have learned over the past 13 years of following Christ is, when I do things the way the Bible says to do them, life just works a little more smoothly. It is not perfect or always great, but it does tend to work better when I am following the one who created life. I pray that my daughter and Alexa can follow the giver of life.

Is Jesus enough?

I was driving the other day and flipped on the Christian music station. A woman was doing an interview with a local band and as I listened to the interview something that the singer said really irked me. The dj told him that his music did not sound Christian. She said it was much more edgy and dance like than other Christian artists. His reply was what did me in. He said that their group really wants to draw in a younger crowd. They are attracted to the music and then they get to share the gospel with them. This made me upset.

Before I tell you why, I want to say that this is something Todd and I have been thinking and talking about for a while. This is not something I am targeting at any one church in particular. I think this is a pretty prevalent thing in Christian culture in general. And when Todd and I have approached this subject with people they tend to get angry and think that we are attacking them or judging them. That is not my intent. I just want us to think about the way we approach sharing the gospel and see if it lines up with scripture.

Here is what I think: We as Christians think that we need something to catch an unbelievers attention. We need to draw them in and then we can share the gospel with them. We need good music, a flashy video, a humorous drama, a charismatic preacher. We need something to catch their eye. We need to be fun, funny, hip and cool. We will not say this, but in essence I think sometimes, some of us think Jesus, alone, is not enough. We cannot simply point to Jesus. Is Jesus enough? Strip away every flashy show we can put on. Take away any of our efforts and ask, do we believe that Jesus has what this unbelieving world needs? Or do we think he needs our help?

Now before you get angry and defensive let me say I think that artist on the radio had good intentions. And I think if you asked him the above questions he would probably say Jesus is enough. I would say that, and you would probably agree with me. But think about the way we talk. I have found myself saying things like draw them in and then share the gospel.

Now I have nothing against a church or a person being relevant to the culture. Obviously scripture gives us clear places where people became like the people they were ministering to in order to share Jesus with them. Obviously if you are a missionary to China you need to speak Chinese. But how often do we package or box up the gospel in order to present it in just the perfect way? Do we miss the holy spirit prodding us to simply point to Jesus because we don't have a perfect package with us at the moment?

What would our Churches look like if on Sunday morning we walked in and the pastor simply read directly from God's word?

Romans 3:10
"As it is written: 'There is no one righteous, not even one.'"

Romans 3:21-24
"But now a righteousness from God, apart from law, has been made known, to which the law and prophets testify. This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus."

What if, instead of trying to prove to our friends that Christians are hip and cool, we simply share with them that there is a reason for hope? There was a man who lived and died and rose again. He did all of this because all of us have sin. Sin eats away at life and separates us from God. Sin destroys and wounds and hurts, but Jesus came to wash away our sins and makes us as white as snow. He came to heal and restore and redeem our very lives. He is what an unbelieving world needs. They do not need better music, better videos, better sermons. They need a savior. And they need someone to show him that savior.

The church (meaning the whole body of Christ) is beautiful. I love the church. I think that the church throughout history and now has done so many wonderful things. The church helps the poor, helps the sick, helps the wounded and broken hearted. The church helps orphans and widows and the lonely. But they do all of this because of the love Christ has for us. The moment one of us does these things or anything else because of any other motivation we have moved away from the calling. (1st Corinthians 13:3)The moment we think that we have anything else this world needs other than Jesus we have missed the calling. There will always be better music, better speakers, better videos, and even nicer people (yes I said that). The world can offer so much more than we can in terms of those things. But what the world does not have is an answer to the longings of the heart. A hope for our sin and brokenness. The church and the body of Christ alone has that answer. The answer is Jesus Christ. He is what we need and he is more than enough.

Small blessings

I was definitely at the end of my rope a few weeks ago. I stated in a previous post all that was ensuing and there was more going on that I did not share, but one day I snapped. Not in a bad way. But I did. I called Todd and said we need to find a babysitter for Saturday night. I need some time without these kids and some time alone with you. We try to have date nights, but anyone with kids knows that sometimes it is so much work to go out without the kids that we just do not do it.

First you have to find a sitter.
Don't get me wrong. We have a number of wonderful, reliable people on hand who are more than willing to jump at the opportunity to watch our kids. Just last weekend we had to find a sitter for something. I asked one of my dearest friends and had three other friends ask me, after the fact, if they could babysit. One even wanted me to cancel the people I had asked because she said she wanted to do it so badly. So we have people willing to do it. People even desiring to do it. But often I feel bad for asking. I feel like we are taking away someones time and inconveniencing them. I am not sure why. I do not feel that way when I am asked to watch a friends child. But I just think like that.

Also I worry about the kids. They generally do really well with most of the people we have watch them, but there has been a time or two that went really poorly and resulted in us having to return home early because of something that was going on. In Claire's first year of life we rarely ever left her with anyone. She had occasional moments where she would stop breathing and choke. So she hardly ever left my side, even at night.

In would say there is a second reason but really the sitter thing is it.

In saying all of this I am trying to get to the point that I snapped and asked Todd for a night out. We found a sitter and quickly arranged for a nice time without kids. A few days later we found out that we were going to have the opportunity for four weekends in a row of date nights. We have been through two and this weekend we get a whole night alone with the kids. Elizabeth has been begging to sleep over at my moms and this weekend it worked out. Of course to my delight Elizabeth insisted that her sister come too. :) Yeah for a whole night alone with my hubby.

My point in all of this is that these date nights have really given me a boost. I have something to look forward to and the nights themselves have been so refreshing to me and our marriage.

But why as moms do we not take care of ourselves more? Why is it that I needed to snap to ask for some alone time? Why can't I just do that all the time? I don't know. But I do know this... anyone willing to babysit just need ask. I have a new attitude about date night.

St. Patricks Day

I am not Irish and I do not drink beer so St. Patty's day holds very little meaning for me. It was, however, the day after St. Patrick's day 4 years ago that I found out I was expecting Elizabeth. She changed my life forever and made me a mommy. Today I did not do anything particularly Irish and I did not even wear green. But I did thank God that he gave me this precious little girl. Even though I was not really planning on becoming a mommy that day he thankfully did not listen to my plans.